I am a Malayalee Indian living in America. I believe in Christ. I get confused over some things when I have to do them. When I do things, I struggle between Malayalee, American and Christian ways. I went to a single male`s house to do homework alone. Everyone in my community I talked to said it was wrong because I put myself for an assault and bad name. I don`t want to be raped or assaulted or get a bad name in the future. I went because I had a test due and this gentleman is my tutor at school and he offered to help me for free. What should I have done? (Profile: Female 18-30).
I am glad that you believe in Christ. And I know there are a lot of adjustments needed when you live in a foreign country with its completely different cultural set up. You said you talked to some in your community about this matter If it was just a normal thing, there would not have been the need for talking about It at all. And every one said it was wrong. Ok., There is a principle you should follow before doing any thing. If there is a question mark about any thing you wish to do, DO NOT ever do it till all doubts are cleared!
You asked what you should have done in your situation. You should have politely refused his offer to help you freely because one never knows whether he is trying to fish with a bait. From our daily experiences we know how corrupt the world around us is. Tragically none can predict what is in the mind of another person near us. Yea, some times even we ourselves do things against our own wishes and only after the action, we realize the seriousness of it! The Bible describes human heart as deceitful and desperately wicked (Jer.17:9). Please read a verse from the Bible. “And the Lord saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. (Gen 6:5). Jesus said that the human heart is the seat of all evils (Mk.7:21,22). This has nothing to do with culture at all. Human heart is corrupt every where. In educated society it takes a more subtle form. That is all.
It is alright for ladies to meet up with men alone, whether married or unmarried, under supervision or in public places. But one has to make sure that the opposite thing never takes place. As for me, as an Indian (Malayalee), living in India and a senior citizen now, for what ever reason, I would NEVER go alone in to the house a lady staying alone. And Dr. Billy Graham made it a policy never to be alone with another lady under any circumstances. . I am citing Dr. Billy Graham to show you that culture has nothing to do with this decision. If not for any thing else, do not give others a chance to scandalize our name for any reason. Remember there are so many critical eyes watching us and it is best for us to criticize ourselves before we do any thing rather than letting others criticize us. When they do it, it will some times be with out mercy and it would hurt us rather deeply and some times it will even affect our whole future itself. So why give the devil a chance (Eph.4:27)?
You can not take back what you have already done. But never ever do it in future. It may never end up in raping or in an assault of any kind. But who knows whether it might not end up in illegal actions with mutual consent?! One can never rule out either possibilities!! So take heed to yourself and keep yourself safe from any assault of the devil (1Pet.5:8). May the Lord give you grace for His glory. Amen.